Square Balls

An elderly woman walked into the headquarters of the Bank of Canada saying she wanted to open an account. Because it was a lot of money, she said, she insisted on talking to the bank's president.

The manager could tell from the look in her eye -- and the huge amount of cash he could see in her purse -- that she was quite serious, so he took the woman to the president's office.

The president of the bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, "$395,000". The president was curious and asked her how she had been able to save so much money. The elderly woman replied that it was from betting.

"Betting?" the president replied. "What do you bet on?"

The elderly woman replied, "Well, I bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square."

The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that.

The woman never batted an eye. She just looked directly in the president's eye and said, "Would you like to take my bet or not?"

"Certainly," replied the president. "I bet you $25,000 that my testicles are not square."

"Done," the woman answered. "But given the amount of money involved, if you don't mind I would like to come back at 10:00 tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness."

"A reasonable precaution," said the president.

Sure enough, the next morning at exactly 10:00 the elderly woman arrived at the president's office with her lawyer and repeated the $25,000 bet made the day before that the president's testicles were square.

The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before. Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants so that she and her lawyer could see clearly.

For that kind of money the president was happy to oblige. The elderly woman came closer so she could see better and asked the president if she could touch them.

"I suppose so," said the president. "Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% sure."

The elderly woman did so with a little smile. Suddenly the president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall.

He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that and she replied, "Probably because I bet him $125,000 that I could convince the President of the Bank of Canada to drop his pants and let me grab his balls within five minutes of stepping into his office!"